Sunday, September 22, 2013

Green Cart/ Hot Tub/ Slow Cooker

Green Cart/ Hot Tub/ Slow Cooker
or
How to Eat Out of a Recycling Bin and Get Noticed

Three months have past since the introduction of the 'Green Cart', recycling program. And out of a possible total of five rotten apple cores I give it a three and one half. This self proclaimed above average victory, of my two wheeled multi -purpose ( that's right, multi-purpose) green slow cooker, tub and cart is one I thought I would never proclaim.
Why even the little beige and white the kitchen container that came zip-wire to its shiny toy solider green body is deserving of a round of applause every time I open it's lid.
The 240 liter cart that I was entrusted with, by the City of Richmond, has been a real God send this past summer. July was hot! And because of the water tight properties of my Green Cart it doubled as a personal hot tub. I would half fill my 'Green Tub' with the garden hose in early morning, and by afternoon, I would top off the water level with my bulk for a comfortable dip. And with its privacy lid, one could enjoy a calming soak in the middle of the wife's begonia patch (this location was chosen as to not waste water. After a good soak, and exfoliation, the nutrient rich water was then ladled onto her prize winning perennials. I tried it on the tomatoes but they came out tasting funny.).
Just a cautionary note here....it's a one man tub. Don't get all crazed up some night and you and the wife try to have a romantic interlude in it. The good city of Richmond didn't make it for that purpose. Just cause the patio table was just out of reach......and your wife (on the side with the wheels) reaches too far over,for her light libation, and the cart tips you, her, and what's left of 120 liters of warm hose water, crushing her begonias, doesn't mean you can get after the city of Richmond for poor product design.
What our 'Green Carts' do and are only suppose to do is recycle yard and kitchen waste. But with its ability to retain solar heat,which make it a slow cooker, and hot tub it earns three and one half rotten apple cores out of five.
The cute kitchen container that piggy-backed in on my hot tub was just too nice to fill with rotting, stinking, putrid, or the wifes meatloaf, kitchen waste. I took mine to work for two months as my lunch box. And do you know for those two months I won the companies environment award each month. And, I got a raise! It seems management, watching me eat carrots and celery from my recycling kitchen container, thought I was going the extra mile on environment concerns. And the raise came because my diet, as it would appear, was lacking in anything fresh,or, before it's sell by date.
Again just a note here...it's a great way to get a raise but you will probably be stuck in the warehouse the rest of your career for eating,what would appear to be, garbage.
The round of applause, I give to the kitchen container each time I lift the lid, is just me trying to kill them little #€!!# flies that come with every piece of rotting, stinking, putrid (not the meatloaf, its too hard) piece of fruit. I spin around h kitchen, high and low applauding my little beige box. Why sometimes for no reason at all (it appears) I break into applause. I'm very appreciative!
Again, just a note....You can place the kitchen container in the fridge to rid yourself of these flying nuisances, but tell your spouse what your doing. Because, for the first three days of taking my new lunch box to work, I was eating rotting, stinking, putrid (again not the meatloaf) leftovers, placed there for recycling.
So even with random and loud applause, I'm afraid the kitchen container only achieves one and a half rotting apple cores out of five as a recycling container. Had its lid been air tight a much higher score would of been obtained.
But...as a lunch box! Five rotten apple cores out of five!


Bob Niles
604/761/2466


bobby did this

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